Saturday, September 26, 2009

Late Night Thought

I had every intention of telling a story tonight, but then I just threw up. A lot. Pretty much everything I ate today. I thought I had a pretty good chance at keeping it all down, but that just wasn't the case.

And now I just feel like a liar because I can't think of anything other than why this is happening to me, and I swore not to do that. I just threw up and I don't want to get out of bed to do it again, and I know that everyone else my age is out on their Friday night doing what someone my age is supposed to be doing with their Friday night. I'm too sick to fall asleep, too alone not to cry, and all I know is that this is the closest I've ever felt to death and I'm praying with all my heart for it not to come any closer, though it's entirely out of my control. All I want is for someone to come here and be with me. Just wrap their arms around me. Just until I fall asleep.